This week I’m having dinner with one of my best friends from college.
She lives in Westchase and I live in South Tampa and when you’re married with a husband and a stressful career and young children and one of you is still breastfeeding, the distance between Westchase and South Tampa, while only fifteen miles or so, may as well be different continents.
It’s okay. We understand each other is busy and going literally months without speaking isn’t personal and, to be honest, isn’t noticed. We are so excited to catch up.
Time goes so fast at this stage. Our free time is consumed with dance class and soccer practice and school activities and birthday parties and when we have true time to ourselves, sometimes we just want to sit in our beds and read a book without having to talk to anyone or go anywhere.
We are in cripplingly busy seasons. We have struggles. This isn’t post-college where you see, text, and talk to your buddies several times a day, regularly meet for drinks after work, and spend your weekends socially at the beach with magazines and cocktails in hand. You don’t have time for that. Your network of fifty acquaintances is whittled down to a handful of close friends because there’s no time for anybody else.
You don’t have time for pettiness and drama. You don’t have time to hold anyone’s hand unless it’s your child’s. You don’t have time to be around people who you have to walk on eggshells around because the smallest thing could hurt someone’s feelings.
You just don’t dang have time for anybody who isn’t low maintenance.
So to my low maintenance friends, thank you.
Thank you for understanding that I’m busy and when I don’t regularly communicate with you, it sure isn’t personal.
Thank you for understanding that I might feel overwhelmed and for reaching out and offering to help instead of being judgental about things you’re assuming.
Thank you for including me in your plans even when I’ve turned down your invitations a hundred times before.
Thank you for not discussing your “concerns” about me to other people.
Thank you for being chill and not overanalyzing things.
Thank you for being able to pick up exactly where we left off when, because of our particular life seasons, we haven’t seen each other in a while.
Thank you for being authentically kind and trustworthy and not holding grudges.
Thank you for being easy.
Thank you for being there no matter what.
Cheers to the low maintenance friends.