The Lady Who Saved My Sanity: The Mother’s Helper


How to find a mother's helper | The Champagne Supernova

Our beloved Aba

This is Josephine, but we call her “Aba,” short for Abuela, which means Grandmother in Spanish. She joined our family in August of 2014 and what followed included a heaping wad of sanity for all four of us.

I could barely get myself dressed, out of the house, and to work on time when I had zero children. I definitely couldn’t do those things when I had one child. When I was pregnant with our second, I knew we needed to find someone to help get us out of the house in the morning. I didn’t want valuable after-work time with my kids to be consumed with the stress of coming home, getting unpacked, making dinner, doing laundry, cleaning up from dinner, washing bottles, and getting ready to do it all over again the next day. Enter Aba.

Aba is what I call a “Mother’s Helper.” I definitely think I coined this phrase because Lord knows Google had no clue what I was looking for when I was on the internet frantically looking for one during my last few weeks of maternity leave. Aba arrives at our house each weekday morning at 7 am and leaves a couple hours later at 10. In that timeframe, she washes bottles, makes lunch for both girls, does our laundry, makes the beds, and has dinner ready and waiting for us when we arrive home.

If I had to come home and do these things after working a full day, it would not be pretty. I’m positive I would be sobbing in a corner while rocking back and forth in fetal position, angry at the world.

Lots of parents do this on their own, I get it. But this is my one “splurge” for myself.

Not only is Aba helpful, but she is a joy to spend our mornings with and she treats my daughters like they are her own children. She genuinely cares for them and will often call or text to see how they are doing when they are sick.

Best of all, she’s able to watch them for the day when they are too sick to go to school and my husband and I have obligations at work that are difficult to miss. Aba’s gotten us out of many a work bind, as we don’t have local family who can cover for us in an eleventh-hour emergency.

Being a parent is really hard. It’s even harder when you’re keeping a ton of balls in the air- to include a marriage, career, hobbies, obligations, and friendships. This isn’t limited to working moms. I’ve (temporarily) experienced the struggle of staying home with kids and man, it’s exhausting. While having Aba has required us to sacrifice between buying fancy “stuff” or keeping her around, just knowing that I can come home from work and legitimately play with the girls without being taunted by the laundry demons makes her worth every red cent.

What are things you’ve done to simplify your life in order to enjoy time with your children? Do you have any “outside the box” tips to share with busy moms who need extra help?

Cheers to simplifying your life!

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    15 Comments on The Lady Who Saved My Sanity: The Mother’s Helper

    1. Allison Walsh
      January 21, 2015 at 11:28 am (2 years ago)

      How did you find her? Was she with an agency?
      Love your blog:)

      Reply
      • jenniferdaku
        January 21, 2015 at 11:46 am (2 years ago)

        Sorry I realized this was for another post- I found her from a friend’s nanny. She actually lives on my street, so it was destiny. If you’re looking for one, you might contact your local schools for volunteers who might be interested in the extra money, your church, or from word of mouth. Good luck!

        Reply
    2. Christina
      January 15, 2015 at 6:54 am (2 years ago)

      So happy you found her! I remember being overwhelmed in gods plan when she entered. How crazy her story and situation perfectly aligned with yours.

      Reply
      • jenniferdaku
        January 16, 2015 at 10:42 am (2 years ago)

        Christina- I thank GOD for YOU that you put me in touch with your former nanny, who then told me about Aba. You’re the best. I think everyone needs an Aba.

        Reply
    3. Kim
      January 14, 2015 at 9:54 pm (2 years ago)

      I just went back to work after maternity leave and have been struggling to juggle all of the same things. I’m glad to know I’m not alone and I need to find us an “Aba” ASAP! Love your blog and your honesty

      Reply
      • jenniferdaku
        January 15, 2015 at 6:06 am (2 years ago)

        Thank you Kim! I hope the transition wasn’t too rough- your little girl is beautiful.

        Reply
    4. Emily Sitz
      January 14, 2015 at 5:03 pm (2 years ago)

      She is so sweet! How awesome for you and her.

      Reply
    5. Nicole Meador
      January 14, 2015 at 4:03 pm (2 years ago)

      I’m lucky enough to have an Aba. She is my mother-in-law and the rock to our world. I understand the life of working full time, having 2 kids (5 and 9months currently) Its a MAD house. Without her to help with laundry, cleaning, dishes, etc I do not know what I would do! Cheers to the working moms.

      Reply
      • jenniferdaku
        January 14, 2015 at 8:42 pm (2 years ago)

        I love this! Cheers to you and your Aba, Nicole!

        Reply
    6. Gentel
      January 14, 2015 at 11:02 am (2 years ago)

      I have been thinking about getting some extra help lately because my evenings and weekends are just how you describe! It would be so nice to get that time back with my daughter!

      Reply
      • jenniferdaku
        January 14, 2015 at 3:15 pm (2 years ago)

        DO IT! There’s still time to have that special time with your daughter. Can’t wait to check out your blog.

        Reply
    7. Lindsay
      January 14, 2015 at 10:08 am (2 years ago)

      Love your blog! What a wonderful find! Finding someone like this makes life run so much more smoothly and she just seems like a lovely person!

      Reply
      • jenniferdaku
        January 14, 2015 at 3:15 pm (2 years ago)

        Thank you and preach it sister! Can’t wait to check out your blog!

        Reply
    8. Emily W.
      January 14, 2015 at 9:08 am (2 years ago)

      I think you need to start Aba Agency! We all need a Josephine!

      Reply
      • jenniferdaku
        January 14, 2015 at 9:37 am (2 years ago)

        Great idea. Now I can have four jobs. 🙂

        Reply

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